The Strategy That Got You Here Won't Get You There
There is a pattern I see again and again, and it is so woven into everyday life that when I name it, most people push back. Not because it isn't true. Because it looks too familiar to be the problem.
Here is what it looks like in real life.
Em found her way into a new career after a former colleague recruited her to join his team. At first she was energized. She could see the potential. But over time, the support and training she had been promised quietly disappeared. She asked. Then she pushed harder. Then she finally accepted that her boss simply wasn't going to deliver. He was eventually let go, and she was promoted into his position.
With the new boss, Em did everything right. She stated her needs upfront, transparently, before taking the role. Six months later, she was in the exact same spot as with the previous manager — asking for support and not receiving it.
Em is talented, self-aware, and proactive, so much so that she was recruited and promoted into jobs she had not even applied for. The strategy she was using — advocating clearly for what she needed — was a good one. In fact it's so good I encourage many of the people I work with to do that more. The problem wasn't the strategy. It had worked before. But it was the only tool she kept reaching for, even when it no longer worked.
Another example comes from Ellen. She joined her family's business as a second career after reaching her goals in her first one. The challenge wasn't so much her parent's love or intentions — it was the pattern they kept repeating. They had productive meetings with clear agreements, only for her dad to jump back in when things got heated, even in the areas they'd agreed were hers to run. Directives, progress demands, disruption. Every time. Ellen kept trying to renegotiate from a place of reason and mutual respect. Also a good strategy. Also not working.
What Em and Ellen have in common isn't bad luck or bad bosses. It's that they each had a strategy that had worked well for a long time, and because it had worked, they couldn't see when it had stopped being effective. The problem isn't having a good strategy. The problem is believing it's the only one.
There's an axiom I come back to often: What got you here won't get you there. But I want to take it a step further, because I think we misunderstand what "there" means.
Let's imagine we are going on vacation to a country far away. We get on a plane because it's the best way to cross an ocean. It gets us 90% of the way, maybe more. But no one expects the plane to pull up to the door of their hotel. At some point, you get off the plane and you need a different mode of transportation entirely. Not because the plane failed. Because you're somewhere new now, and new terrain requires a different approach.
The same is true for the strategies that have carried us through our careers and our relationships. They worked. They were exactly right for where we were. The question isn't whether they were good strategies. The question is whether they are still the right ones for where you are trying to go.
So here is what I want to ask you: What strategy have you been running on autopilot? Where are you still boarding the plane when what you actually need is a different vehicle entirely?
The awareness is the first move. Everything else follows from there.
Sometimes that awareness comes on its own. Sometimes it helps to have someone in your corner who can see what you can't yet.
Ready to get unstuck? If you're high-achieving and keep running into the same walls, coaching might be exactly what's next. Book a discovery call and let's find out.
Journaling Practice
Want to explore this topic more? Here are prompts you can take to your journal.
Think of a situation where you keep getting the same frustrating result. What is the one approach you keep returning to, even when it doesn't deliver?
What would you try if you knew this strategy wasn't available to you? What might change for you and others if you did?
Where in your life are you waiting for others to change instead of asking what you could do differently? What does sitting with that question inspire you to try, and how might you put it into practice?
What would it mean for you to "get off the plane" in one area of your life right now — and what's the next vehicle you haven't let yourself consider?
